the atrocity of a word before an assigned meaning;
a clumsy jumble of vocalizations in mistaken characterizations
tell me: am i a voice or a void?
tell me: am i void of meaning to you?

figurines of speech dancing on tiptoe
a ballet of questions and tragedies
ironically a metaphoric metamorphosis
a drunken lad caught mid-echappe
i- a tendu through your teeth

and hair full of dread
i'm pulling at the seams
pulling at the loose edges of my childhood vocabulary-
a sacred collection of untranslatable words;
fragmented sentences; crackling euphemisms

the air is thick with vibrations
the music of the unfamiliar
dispersing into dissonance
and i st-stutter-
an avalanche of things i'm dying to say
but do not know how to in your language

((the nightmare of a poet))

stranger,
i wanted to call to you
from the balcony
the first night in this city
tell you how the panorama
has been stained onto the inside of my eyelids
and what it felt like
to finally see it with my eyes wide open

stranger,
when my backstory buckled at my ankles
you were fingertips to the earth,,,,
gathering the bits and bolts of connection
that leaped from my exoskeleton
i wrapped my arms around you
but never learned your name;
i'll call you a glitch in entropy
a miracle in disguise

stranger,
i was enamored by the way you moved the scene
how you harvested celebration with your feet,
tiny explosions waltzing * up * your * spine
a kinetic parallel with mine;
i've danced but never like this before
i've never danced to say "thank you"
but thank you for letting a girl like me
twirl around in this holy space
as if i'd belonged there my whole life

stranger,
i saw you do a double take
as i spoke another tongue on your sidewalk
lips twisted into contortions
you haven't felt on your face since your last airplane
you assume more about me than i'll ever know about you
i wish i knew as much as you
i wish i was as worldy as you
i want to take a vial to every body of water and bottle it
i want to place myself on every continent and polarize a sunset from it
i want to gargle with melted everest ice and dead sea salt to force the words out of my throat
stranger, tell me,
is existence defined by experience?
tell me,
is existence confined by lack of experience?
is the world only as big as the places we've been?
tell me,
can my presence say more than the words i don't know;
beyond the language we don't share?

stranger,
can we communicate through the choreography of our mannerisms?
from the things we choose to capture on camera?
with merely the stars in our eyes?

there are more people on earth than every word in every language combined

can we dive to ineffable depths?
maybe experience is defined by how one carries their existence
and this is where i brought mine
it's funny: you thought i was a local until my accent made you chuckle
but go ahead and ask me why i'm here
and i'll explain with my childhood vocabulary,
the simple words i've known by heart
i'll tell you:

this is my home.
((zeh habayit sheli)).